I saw video of Grays that added another dimension to the rubber band theory, he talks about how men don't like things brought up constantly (like when women try to talk to make themselves feel better) and we should respect that because it doesn't feel good to be reminded of the past when you're trying to enjoy the moment and just move forward.
But such advice would certainly explain the sad guy’s lament that: “Nice guys finish last.” Or, in this new poetic mode: “Nice begets ice.” But then how do we explain the “bad boy” syndrome, so familiar to Hollywoodfans? Remember: Too much pulling on an elastic band will eventually break it. Or, more prosaically, what have your relationships been like? After significant trouble due to distancing and not sharing true feelings (both sides) in my marriage, we're now separated and I'm seeking "answers".
This describes a person with a fetish or kink as their only existing sexuality.
People like this are unable to engage in standard (vanilla) sexual intercourse with anyone else of either gender and can only be aroused by the said fetish.
How can a woman continue to keep giving if she knows it's going to result in him withdrawing to his man cave??
A strong independent woman will have her own friends and interests and will not need his company 24/7 but if he continues to 'pull away' if he's maxed out his intimacy quota on are gulag basis he risks his relationship or his marriage if HE doesn't learn to deal with the responsibility of being part of someone else's life or part of a family. We know we must have some boundaries, but this elastic band theory seems more about control and neurosis than love, so I think we must reject it as emotionally immature and narcissistic.Proper relationships in my opinion do not follow such frankly proposerous notions and instead, as you say, follow realistic boundaries of trust and respect, regardless of who's going through what in their 'love cycle' or whatever.I'm not attracted to a man who buggers off at unpredictable moments.What if I or our future family need him at that time?